Setting goals when your business bores you
Yesterday I was talking to a Roundtable member, Bill, from Colorado. His goal at the beginning of 2011 was 30% growth. He finished the year yesterday at 30.1% growth. He’s in a market where everyone else has lost ground this year, so BRAVO!
He mentioned that he wanted 2012 to bring him some new adventures; a repeat of 2011 wouldn’t be all that inspiring for him. He asked what I thought his 2011 goal should be.
I thought of my current project, the 2012 Ultimate Guide to Google AdWords – editing the 2nd edition to make the 3rd edition.
When I began, I was bored with it. “Gotta go through this thing and fix the stuff that’s out of date. B-o-r-i-n-g.”
Then I realized: Who wants to buy a book like THAT?
Now to be honest, I could do the updates and it would be a perfectly decent, above-average book, and people would buy it, yada yada yada.
But if I just did that, none of the people who bought the earlier versions would ever get excited about the new one.
I also knew if I was bored with it, my boredom would inevitably seep into my writing. It would be stale. Which is an ideal recipe for becoming a “has-been.” People would start to say, “Yeah, Perry’s AdWords stuff used to be really great, then….”
I asked myself a question:
“What would get ME excited about this book?”
Gears began to turn. I realized I have a many new ideas. And some strong opinions. All edgy. For example:
-The Dark Side of Google (we’ve been Mr. Nice Guy in our books; I’ve only taken the gloves off in emails and seminars). This time readers are gonna get it from me straight. If Google doesn’t like it – too bad for them.
-Social Media. My opinions about Social run 180 degrees from the mainstream, with some important jags. I’m adding a chapter on harnessing Social Media and Fanalytix data to feed your AdWords intelligence. It’s 2 years ahead of the curve.
I’m gonna give the Social Media divas a spanking, then give my peeps tasty, meaty morsels they won’t get anywhere else. Plus brand new online bonuses.
-I’m reaching into my archive for a brilliant missive Phil Alexander wrote about Las Vegas and the gambling industry. He shows how the Google industry took exactly the same path. Not at all obvious, but incredibly incisive. Unusual. Edgy.
NOW I’m excited about this book.
Remember, it started with a question: “What would it take for me to get excited about this?”
I asked Bill: “What 2012 goal would YOU get excited about?”
He’ll decide soon, an execute.
That’s what I want YOU to think about today. As we head into New Years Eve, submit that question to your brain and make space for an answer.
What 2012 goal would get YOUR pulse pounding???
Happy New Year!
Perry Marshall
Kick your 2012 business in high gear, in just 48 hours.
4-Man Intensive January 20-21:
http://www.4manIntensive.com/
A salute to all who are WORKING today
The Friday before Christmas I posted on my Facebook page:
“Hit LIKE if you are NOT taking the day off, but instead you’re earning the dinero and getting stuff done while everybody else parties and drinks hot chocolate.”
That got more shout-outs than almost anything I’ve ever posted!
Today the phones are quiet and half the vendors are away and if you’re reading this today, you’re probably cleaning up loose ends, furiously preparing for 2012.
I’m working on the Google 3rd edition book (which will be a full step better than the previous); planning programs for early 2012 and building out my new Private Client Group.
The compound interest you earn in the rest of the year is considerable. It means while most people won’t get their act together until about January 20, you’ll hit the ground running on January 2.
And though entrepreneurs don’t get a lot of gratitude from the rest of the world, we members of Planet Perry understand the power of what you do.
Stay tuned because on January 9 I’m introducing “80/20 Productivity Express.” What is it? Bottom line, it’s about getting 30 minutes more real work done every single day in 2012 than you got done in 2011. Which also earns huge compound interest.
REMEMBER THIS:
*Everything* you do – everything – earns compound interest.
For most people, it’s a string of growing liabilities and messes that never get cleaned up.
For some, it’s the upward spiral of being more in control, having more choices, and being more satisfied with how you spend each day.
You alone decide.
Perry Marshall
Tea & Starbucks in the Forbidden City
I just came back from China, where a cup of green tea *normally* costs about 25 cents. That’s the price at a typical street vendor.
But at the world-famous Forbidden City in Beijing, crawling with gringo tourists, a cup of green tea costs $4.00.
Why does it cost 16X as much in the Forbidden City as it costs 3 blocks away?
Because some people are willing to pay four bucks. That’s why.
It doesn’t even have to be a lot of ‘em. Just some some. It’s what they want, where they want, and they have the dinero.
This is not only true in China. It’s just more obvious there.
If I had to reduce ALL the sweeping changes in online marketing since the 2008 crash to one single thing, it’s this:
*A ton of businesses that were “selling tea for 25 cents” are now DOA because “rent” at the “Forbidden City” went up.*
The ones who can still afford traffic are the ones who have a $1 tea department and another $4 tea department. That lowly 25 cent item is merely a loss leader. All the money is made on the upsell. And the affluent client.
If you cannot quickly and clearly articulate your own $4.00 tea strategy, your business is already in trouble. Better buy your burial plot before the price of that goes up too.
Sleep with one eye open. And build out your product offerings relentlessly.
Perry Marshall
Skip Roundtable and join my highest-level advisory circle:
http://www.perrymarshall.com/pcg/
Managing Distractions: The #1 shift that makes 2012 the superior year
My 13 year old son has a t-shirt that says,
“I Don’t Have A.D.D., I just… Hey look! A squirrel!”
The #1 productivity enemy of online marketers is:
Being online.
Ever stumble on a distraction…. which led you to another distraction…. which led to yet another? Pretty soon you committed the sins of a thousand distractions.
If ever a world was custom designed to carry you off course willy nilly, get you gleefully lost and living in a happy timeless stupor, it’s the Internet. Enemy #1. If 2011 fell short of your expectations, distractionitis was probably the top culprit.
Most of us make our livings by distracting people. So, ahem, it’s not like we get to condemn anyone for getting distracted :^>
Still, if you want to earn mucho dinero as a marketer, you MUST master this. You gotta be able to distract without getting distracted yourself. The IM version of “buy low, sell high.”
I’m as susceptible as anyone else. My short attention span is one of the things that makes me a good writer. Always tossing in something unexpected. Mixes things up.
Because I know I am my own worst enemy, I’ve built all kinds of systems and habits that keep me productive and prolific.
In early January I’m doing a very unusual training program where I share the tools and systems that allow me to get so much done, given my passion for distraction. It’s called 80/20 Productivity Express:
http://www.perrymarshall.com/
I’ve priced this affordably, on purpose. So that even if you make ONE tiny change to your daily routine, the course will easily pay for itself 10X over.
Perry
P.S.: It’s not like you have to never get distracted again. You don’t have to be perfect. I just want to protect that 2-3 hours of honest productivity each day from the wolves. Is that too much to ask?
84 year old retail store better than ever, despite…
Yesterday after Christmas dinner I talked to a relative from out of state. He owns a local, brick-and-mortar music retail store.
Problems he faces:
- His bank came to him and said, “There’s no way you’re ever going to make any real money based on what you’re doing and we don’t want the business. Sorry, we’re getting rid of you.” The banker said contrary to what a lot of people would like, banks are not in the business of losing money.
- Competition from Big Box stores, deep discount online retailers and Amazon. There’s no way he can compete with their prices
- He pays sales tax, online retailers don’t
- Lines of credit are h-a-r-d to get, especially post-2008
- Online marketing can only gain him so much traction
- Unlike many Planet Perry folks, he can’t work all day in his underwear
- His original location is lousy and he’s got 3 1/2 years to go on his lease
- He’s in the process of buying out a partner, which costs a lot of money
- Unlike an online biz, scaling his business up demands a very large capital investment up front
- The prices of musical instruments have been deflating for years. Lower prices = less profit
A lot of guys like him started to figure they’re toast 10 years ago when the online wave hit. In spite of all that, here’s his report:
His sales are down slightly compared to last year but his profits are WAY up. His business is in the best shape its been since it was founded in 1927.
Last summer the local Public Schools Administration building burned down, along with 700 instruments. He quickly put together a “donate your used musical instrument to the schools, get a tax deduction and feel good” campaign. Sent out press releases.
Got coverage on 2 TV stations, the newspaper and 2 radio stations. People started coming into the store to donate instruments – and buying other stuff while they were there. You cannot buy that kind of publicity.
He realized that his accountant didn’t understand his business. (Which is VERY common. Odds are 3:1 that your own accountant also doesn’t understand YOUR business. That can be disastrous.)
He fired him and got a new one. Made huge improvements in how they manage rentals and inventory.
Firing the accountant helped him make changes which facilitated changing banks. They went from red to black in cash flow. He’d been making payments to vendors in arrears, which was resulting in higher prices.
With help from his bank and new accountant, started paying them immediately and earning 10% discounts. Fatter margins and happier vendors, who now also give him special treatment.
He’s using Facebook ads and Right Angle Marketing to identify quirks in his audience. His Facebook ads and status updates bring customers into the store.
He’s opened 2 more stores in affluent parts of town. Profits are up. He’s paying a lot more attention to margins and less attention to top line sales. As for his exiting partner, he says, “Hey at least the guy’s not interfering with anything.”
He’s hyper-aware of where he can’t compete with discounters (selling to price shoppers) and noting where they can’t possibly compete with him (people who demand knowledgeable sales people and service.) He’s doing what he does best and slashing everything else.
He’s done an 80/20 on the profitability of product lines, and trimmed whatever doesn’t earn dinero.
He’s writing for music industry magazines. People in the biz not only seek his advice but offer their best insights. He’s become a hub of information. The #1 beneficiary is HIM.
–> This week he’ll make the last payment on his house, which he bought 7 years ago. He owns it lock, stock and barrel now. Not bad for a couple in their late 40′s and early 50′s! <–
He summarizes:
“Marketing is like jazz. You always have to anticipate the unanticipated. You ask yourself, ‘OK, once this new thing stops working, what is going to work after that?” He’s learned how to see around the corner and stay ahead of the curve.
My friend, you might want to ignore the news and doom and gloom. Cuz MANY guys I talk to are like him. Post 2008, they’re running their business a lot smarter and DOING WELL. At least 1/3 of my Roundtable members scored a record month in the last four months. One just crossed the $10 million per year mark with insane profits.
What is YOUR plan for prospering in 2012? Do you know exactly what you’re gonna do?
I’ve started a Private Client Group which gives you exclusive access to me, a direct line to my personal assistant, and a full confidential 1-on-1 day of consulting with me for you and your staff.
I’m taking applications now. Great tax write-off for 2011, then watch your dollars multiply in 2012:
http://www.perrymarshall.com/pcg/
Perry Marshall
I got a toddler for Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
I don’t know what you got, but I got a toddler. 22 pounds of boundless energy!
Our last meal together as a family of six: Breakfast on the Saturday after Thanksgiving
A week ago today we touched down from our 13 hour plane ride from Hong Kong. That’s a long trip under any circumstances. It’s even more interesting with an adopted 1 1/2 year old who’s only known you for 2 weeks!
She was a little clingy and fussy but other than that – great. Couldn’t possibly ask for better.
This entire process has gone w-a-a-a-y better than expected. A month before we went to China, a boy newly adopted in our same hotel did nothing for the first 2 days but sit by the door and scream.
As crazy as that sounds, it’s actually a GOOD sign because it means he’s capable of bonding with whoever he was with before, and grieving the loss. What would be worse would be if he didn’t care. That would mean he’d never developed the ability to form emotional connections. Some kids never do.
| Perry’s Adoption Blog |
We’d gone into this whole thing with a certain amount of trepidation. I might portray myself as a really adventurous guy, but that’s on the OUTSIDE. On the inside, I don’t like it when things change.
Near the beginning, Laura and I had a nasty fight about it because this whole thing was moving way too fast for me. This adjustment did not come easy. In fact it took about five years and a sort of spiritual epiphany. After that I was OK.
December 4. Nanchang China. We come back from lunch and our tour guide is already at the hotel. The director of the orphanage is going to arrive early, and soon she shows up carrying Zoe.
Wow. So this is the kid we’ve seen pictures of! This is the girl I’m going to raise and send to college. Laura holds her, then gives her to me.
She’s very quiet. Pensive. This is so UN-dramatic. I hold her while Laura asks the orphanage director lots of questions. Finally, the director and our guide leave. And here we are on the 11th floor of the Jin Feng Hotel in Nanchang China. Suddenly we’re a family of seven now instead of six.
Our oldest is at home in school and the rest of us are here. With this introverted little girl.
Day 1: Stoic
Who knows what mysteries wait inside?
And . . . what do we do now?
We take it easy.
So we barely went anywhere for awhile. Mostly Laura held her. Very quickly she decided she trusted Laura and didn’t trust anyone else.
She would let the boys play with her but she wouldn’t smile. She hardly ever cried, except when someone besides Laura tried to hold her.
Day 4: Cautious
Laura put her down for bed at 8pm and she slept all the way through the night, as though she were well-trained. At 8am she woke up. We sat her on the floor with her stacking rings.
Laura gave her a bath. She didn’t like it. Laura would feed her; she’d accept the food but she wouldn’t feed herself. She never tried to crawl or move. She didn’t know how to drink from a sippy cup or a straw. She was just so quiet.
We didn’t have any of the crazy drama that you often hear about with adopted kids. She just slowly opened up to us and Laura’s taken care to make sure people around us aren’t poking her and trying to pick her up all the time. She’s going to get a generous amount of time to bond with her new family.
The next day we took her to the city of Nanchang to file the official adoption papers. We gavie our $7000 “cash donation” to the Jiangxi province and took her picture. She didn’t like being there, and whenever we took her anywhere she’d pull further into her ‘shell.’
Day 7: I'm starting to like this.
The Jin Feng hotel is the site of many adoption transactions. It was a quiet week and we were the only family on the 11th floor, which has a play area. We had it all to ourselves. It was an oasis of calm in this crowded, bustling city the size of LA. (And there’s 30+ cities in China that are even bigger than that. Mind blowing.)
The first time we saw her perk up was eating french fries. A couple of days later she was singing to them. She started playing with her 7 year old brother Z-man, and smiling. Then she started feeding me her crackers. After that she let me hold her.
Within a week, she warmed up to us all. She started to become comfortable even when we were going places. She started feeding herself and drinking from a straw. Her brothers would wrestle with each other on the bed and she’d watch with amusement.
She let them pick her up. She sat on the floor and explored her toys while we played Chinese Tom & Jerry cartoons on the TV.
Day 13: I'm up to something....
I wanted to see where she came from, what sort of place it was. She’s from Xinyu, a city of 1 million people 100 miles away. I got a ride and we drove through farmland and smog (the smog didn’t let up a bit, even in wide open spaces) until we got there.
Tree-lined Xinyu, China
One of the big industries there is steel, so I expected a depressing eyesore like Gary Indiana. Quite the opposite. It was full of parks and trees and boulevards. Skyscrapers and condos going up everywhere.
A prosperous, happening city. (Brand new unfinished condos there cost fifty bucks a square foot, if you’re interested.)
The whole town is very modern. They have solar-powered street lights and they’re known for energy technology.
The Social Welfare Institute in Xinyu, Jiangxi, China
I stopped at the Civil Affairs Bureau where she was dropped off in May 2010. I drove by the orphanage where she’d lived for the last 18 months. Took pictures. Stopped at a restaurant, where the local waitresses are obviously not used to seeing gringos.
We’d get on video chat with Drama Queen back home and she was trying to crawl through the screen to hold her new little sister.
About a month ago I picked Drama Queen up from school and she said, “Dad, I don’t think Zoe should stay in my room. I think she should sleep with you and mom. Because she’s going to keep me up at night and I’m in high school and I have to get good grades.”
I said, “I need MY sleep because I have to pay for your high school. I think she should sleep with YOU!”
We agreed to disagree.
A few weeks later, the Queen’s status update says, “As soon as Zoe gets here I’m going to take her into a cave and refuse to leave.” She’s DELIGHTED to share a room with her little sister.
It took Zoe a day or two to warm up to Laura; about four days to warm up to me; when we got home last Sunday we walked out of customs at O’Hare airport and Drama Queen was jumping up and down. “MY NEW LITTLE SISTER! MY NEW LITTLE SISTER!”
And Zoe’s lookin’ at her like, “And who, might I ask, is THIS???” She’s staring at her big sis with that poker face.
But they get in the van and ride home next to each other. By the time they get home, Zoe is letting big sis carry her all over the house. She lets her take her up to their room and Drama Queen lays Zoe down in her crib and takes a nap – MamaLaura doesn’t have to lift a finger.
Oh, and the boys LOVED their sister from the word go. This is just so cool. In fact, here’s a video where you can watch Zoe bonking Z-man in the face with a 7-Up bottle:
When we first got Zoe, she didn’t feed herself, she didn’t crawl, she didn’t walk, she didn’t do much of anything. Offhand I’d say she was acting like a 9 month old even though she’s 19 months.
Laura took her to the pediatrician this week, and the doctor said she acts like she’s 14 months.
5 months of development in 2 1/2 weeks? Hey baby, when you’ve got a mama and a daddy and brothers and a big sister and they’re all doting on you, when there’s a dog and a couple of cats and guinea pigs and it’s Christmas break and everyone’s around to play with you … things move fast!
Zoe’s Chinese name, the one the orphanage gave her, is Xin Yuan. There’s a very particular way that you have to pronounce it in Chinese, because Chinese vowels are based on tones.
If you don’t know how to say Chinese vowels (which for English speakers is quite hard), you completely butcher the person’s name.
Chinese is a very picturesque language full of rich metaphors. The reason that Chinese signs sound so dumb in English is because Chinese has all manner of beautiful imagery and poetic allusions. To translate direct to English is usually an act of butchery.
Chinese names also have rich meanings. So pronouncing someone’s name wrong in Chinese is sort of like meeting a guy named Frank and calling him Frankenstein.
Day 18: "I definitely like it here."
Which is why we gave her an English name. But Bryan has a friend named Robert who lives in Guangzhou. We spent a few hours at Robert’s house. We showed him the Chinese characters for Zoe’s original name and asked him to explain to us what they mean.
He studies the Chinese characters and tells us:
“Xin Yuan means new young pretty woman with high education and good behavior. She is very lady-like. She’s polite, has a good personality and excellent communication skills. She’s born from a famous family. She’s the girl who comes to the fashion ball and everyone wants to know who she is.
“It means she never behave like Brittany Spears.”
I look at him. “Seriously? It means all that?”
He nods. “Yessir. It means all of that.”
“Wow.”
So here she is, my little Christmas present. Best I ever got. Along with a seven-city tour in China!
The other day a lady left a comment on my blog asking how we know she wasn’t kidnapped before she was adopted to us.
(Child trafficking is a major problem in the world. Her question may be insensitive, but it’s not a dumb question.)
I replied that she’s got special needs – one leg is 3″ shorter than the other and she has two toes on one foot. We have a copy of her “lost and found” announcement from the local newspaper, announcing that an abandoned baby had been found. She was a month old.
70% of kids being adopted from China have special needs, and if you want a Chinese baby without birth defects, the wait will be 5-6 years.
Most of the adoptive families we met had kids with issues – club hands, club feet, cleft palate, heart issues, limb differences.
In China there is no such thing as “handicapped parking” or wheelchair ramps or any of that. There are stairs everywhere, and every doorway – even doorways inside of buildings – has a six inch threshold that you have to step over.
Handicapped people are invisible in China. To put it bluntly, nobody wants them.
Seven-city tour of China: Beijing, Kunming, Lijiang, Nanchang, Xinyu, Guangzhou and Hong Kong. Xinyu is southwest of Nanchang.
China has a one-child policy and culturally, boys are preferred over girls. Nobody under age 30 in China has a brother or sister; they’re all only children.
When we’d walk down the street with our three boys, EVERYONE stared at us. When we added a Chinese girl, they stared even more. When we told them Kid #5 was still at home, they could hardly believe their ears.
Just the other day on a group coaching call, a guy was puzzled. “One child policy? How do they enforce that?”
“Ethnic minorities and rural citizens are exempt from this, but people who have a second child get slapped by a huge fine, i.e. several years’ income.”
“What if they don’t pay it?”
“Um, you don’t want to know.”
I’ll leave the rest to you to figure out or research for yourself. Suffice it to say, if people are only allowed to have one child, and the one they have is a handicapped girl – there’s a chance she’ll be abandoned.
That means there’s plenty of girls in Chinese orphanages waiting to be adopted. There’s also LOTS of boys, simply because China is better known for adopting girls.
I’ve been surprised how many of my friends have told me in recent weeks that they’ve thought about adopting a child. My friend, if that’s in your heart, then you can at least start investigating.
Yeah, I know it costs money. (Maybe as much as a new car.) Yeah, I know it takes a lot of time and patience. Yeah I know it’s scary. Cuz you’re reachin’ in to that box of chocolates and you don’t know what you’re going to get. Believe me, I totally get that.
The adoption bloggers have an abbreviation for guys who are skittish about adopting. It’s “RH” – “Reluctant Husband.”
I’ll just say this: The joys – the benefits – are a lot less clear, less obvious than the costs. But they’re all still there and they’re all waiting for you. St. James said, “Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress.”
In Shamian Island in Guangzhou is the American consulate. It’s where all the adoptions are made official. Next door is the White Swan hotel and its world-famous “Red Couch” where all the adopting families get their pictures taken.
We got our picture taken – here’s our little China girl posing for the camera.
After a week of having her with us, she’s still a little bit on Chinese time. She likes to wake up at 3 in the morning.
But other than that, we’ve skipped the sleepless nights that you have with babies and gone straight to the toddler stage.
She babbles all the time. She chases the cat and pulls its tail. She likes the doggie. She likes baths and zerberts.
Remember Robert, who translated her name for us? He made an interesting comment:
“I can tell your daughter understands Chinese, but she doesn’t want to be with me. She can’t understand anything you’re saying but she loves her mama and her family. This is new to me. I’ve never seen this before. Perry, she’s listening to you through her heart.”
Amen, Robert. She sure knows who her family is.
Merry Christmas to you and your family.
Perry Marshall
P.S.: John Paul Mendocha called me the other day and said Perry, I’ve got customers saying me on the phone, “Tell Perry we’re praying for him and his adoption every day.” Right on, and I can feel it too. Joy To The World – God is Good. Thank y’all for sending thoughts and prayers and positive vibes are way. I really appreciate it. A lot!
P.P.S.: More of Laura’s photos here.
It doesn’t get more international than this!
At today’s 4-Man Intensive in Hong Kong, I had a Malaysian from London living in Australia; a German, a Scotsman and guy from Liverpool living in Thailand; an American living in Barcelona; a Japanese guy from Japan and 2 red-blooded Aussies. Our meeting room overlooked Hong Kong Harbor. Nobody was from Hong Kong :^>
Every 4-Man Intensive is totally unique. This was the first one I've done anywhere besides my home in Chicago, and the first to have observers. A total blast!
It’s the first 4-Man that wasn’t at my home in Chicago; my adoption trip to China brought me here. Gotta pay for this adoption excursion, so a 4-Man in Hong Kong was perfect.
My attendees:
- Thomas the German designs and manufactures electronics in Thailand
- The Australians, Steve and Kelley, run a specialized Shipping Business
- Nobuji, the attendee from Japan, is a marketing consultant
- Lucas, the American in Barcelona, is a seminar promoter and info-marketer who sells in three different niches
This was also the first time I’ve had people enroll as observers (they came but didn’t get a hot seat).
We tear each business apart and re-assemble it, and everyone chimes in, each person offering a different perspective. We save people months, even years of struggle because there’s such a high level of intelligence and experience in the room.
Hong Kong City Lights from our dinner boat in the harbor
Oh, and we also took a dinner cruise on Hong Kong Harbor to see the city lights at night.
Hong Kong is an incredibly impressive place – a thoroughly modern city, the New York City of Asia.
Hong Kong’s success is surely one of the reasons Chinese Prime Minister Deng Xiaopeng said, referring to capitalism vs. communism, “No matter if it is a white cat or a black cat; as long as it can catch mice, it is a good cat.” In other words, if capitalism is as prosperous as Hong Kong, it can’t be all bad.
It’s so successful that when the British relinquished control in 1997, in keeping with their agreement with Mainland China, the Chinese government didn’t dare mess with it. While Hong Kong officially belongs to China, it enjoys economic autonomy. It has its own currency and banking system – and freedom of speech.
4 Man Intensive in Hong Kong last weekend: Victor Lamont (Liverpool via Thailand), Thomas Zimpfer (Germany via Thailand), Steve White (Australia), me, Nobuji Kanai (Japan), Adam Sugihto (London via Australia), Jimmy Crangle (Scotland via Thailand), Johannes Klupfel (Germany via Australia). Not pictured: Kelley Johnson (Australia) and Lucas Rockwood (US via Barcelona)
One of the attendees, who was in his 60′s, remembers when Christian organizations were sending relief supplies to Hong Kong after WWII. Hong Kong now rivals Shanghai as the financial capital of Asia.
Every 4-Man event is totally unique, because discussion is a full-contact sport and the chemistry of the personalities and industries never happens twice. We recorded the sessions and everybody gets an MP3 of the entire event.
I can’t predict when I’ll do another international 4-Man Intensive but the ones we do in Chicago are a blast!
I’m A Dad Again: Day 7!
We got Zoe exactly one week ago today.
After lunch last Sunday, the director of the orphanage came to our hotel and brought Zoe to us.
Wow. So here’s our new daughter!
The adoption home study had required us to meet with a therapist who specializes in adoptive families. She ‘checked us out.’ She asked us a bunch of questions like she was supposed to, but she also gave us a heads-up.
She herself had two kids from foreign adoption and she spoke directly to us about attachment issues. She said the worst thing that can happen is if the kid is ambivalent about her new parents, and just goes along without protest.
If the child does that, it means he or she never attached to anyone in the first place and may not have developed the ability to ever attach to anyone. Very bad. (Ever meet someone who was chronically unable to sustain a relationship?)
She said if the kid has a hard adjustment period – even throws severe fits for awhile – that’s good, because it probably means he or she is capable of developing meaningful relationships.
We reach into the box of chocolates, and…..
She cried a little. Mostly she was super quiet. Poker faced. Stoic.
Laura asked the orphanage director a bunch of questions. She said Zoe was one of the staff’s favorites, that she was bright and active and inquisitive.
What we got was a very quiet little girl that was going ‘internal’. An extreme introvert, an observer.
My buddy Jim Heydt says exposing people to trauma is like dropping a giant dictionary on the floor in a room full of cats. The cats scatter every direction you can imagine.
How is one particular person going to respond? Are they going to yell and scream? Are they going to crawl inside a thick shell? Are they gonna go postal or turn psycho? Your guess is as good as mine…. pick a cat and watch what it does when you drop that dictionary on the floor.
Our hotel in Nanchang is a sort of headquarters for adoptions in Jiangxi province. The 11th floor features a big cushy play area. We pretty much had the whole place to ourselves the entire week. It was like getting a super deluxe suite for the price of a regular room!
So we spent lots of time there, just hanging out with Zoe.
Zoe let me hold her at first but she quickly decided that the only person she wanted was Laura.
Little by little she would relax a little. She liked to sit on the floor and play with Z-man. Our little guy is great. He’d sit with her and her stacking rings and stack. She came with a little photo album that we’d sent the orphanage several months ago and point to our pics and she’d smile a little.
Every time I picked her up, she’d start crying.
This is NOT unusual for adopted kids. Especially young ones who can’t talk. It’s not like anyone could fully explain to a 19 month old Chinese girl that she’s about to get English speaking parents and life as she currently knows it is over.
I didn’t take it personally. As long as she likes mom, that’s cool with me. We got on video chat with her 15 year old sister at home. Drama Queen thinks little sis is adorable! She says when we get home she wants to take Zoe into a cave and keep her little sis all to herself.
The first night, Zoe went to bed at 8pm and slept until 8am. No fits, no incidents. It was like she’d been trained to obediently sleep in her crib at the orphanage. WOW.
When presented with food, she wouldn’t grab it. But when we fed her, she’d eat. The poker face would go away just a little bit when she was getting love from mama or playing with Z-man or her toys.
Her first trip out, our guide took us to Wal-Mart. The poker face came back full force. We came home and put her down for a nap and she woke up in a good mood.
We went to a Western-style restaurant called Dio Coffee. Serves Pizza and french fries and she LOVED the french fries. We’d dip them in ketchup and she’d always grab the ketchup end of the fry.
She slept through another night without incident. She still cried every time I tried to pick her up but she grew more and more comfortable with mama.
We visited a famous temple from the Tang dynasty (an era known for art and musical innovation). We went to the city of Nanchang and got our adoption paperwork completed; on Thursday Laura took her and the boys to an amusement park in Nanchang.
At the amusement park, they had “bumper boats” and also a ride that bounced kids crazily on padded surfaces. There’s no way this thing would be legal in the USA, but our kids L-O-V-E-D it.
While they were at the amusement park I made a trip to Zoe’s home town of Xinyu. Xinyu is 100 miles southwest of Nanchang.
We knew she had been dropped off at the bureau of civil affairs, abandoned by her mother.
In the US we have laws that say a mother can abandon a baby simply by bringing it to a police station or fire station and she is free to walk away. At first blush this seems downright irresponsible.
Xinyu in Jianxi, China is a well-manicured place. Ever heard of it? It's one of over 100 cities in China with a million people.
But the alternative is much worse: a desperate young mom, fearing reprisal, sometimes tries to kill her baby, or abandons it in a garbage dumpster or whatever. Giving her a safe ‘out’ which puts the baby in the adoption or foster system is better for everyone.
China has no such law. The penalties are severe, so Zoe’s mom took quite a risk in placing her on the steps of a government office. Obviously she wanted her daughter to be cared for.
Make no mistake, there’s a l-o-n-g line of people waiting to adopt a newborn baby. For “normal” babies from China, the wait is 5 full years. Because Zoe has special needs, the wait is much shorter – once our paperwork was approved and our home study was done, it only took 11 months.
I visited the office where she was dropped off; I also drove by the orphanage and took some pictures. I traveled around the city and got a feel for it. I’d heard it was a steel mill town so I expected something like Gary Indiana. Nope. Xinyu is a very modern, thriving city with high rises going up everywhere, and lots of trees, flowers and boulevards. Even in December, it feels like spring.
My only gripe about Xinyu was the same gripe I have about most of China: The smog. Even the 100 miles of farmland was thick with smog. It was an overcast day and you couldn’t see the clouds above.
When I got back from my trip, I sat down and started feeding Zoe snacks out of her cup. She held her cracker out to me so I ate it. Then she gave me another one and another one. Zoe’s feeding daddy!
After that she let me pick her up and she didn’t cry. She still had her poker face but she was OK.
Then she started drinking out of straws and feeding herself. For the first few days she didn’t do any of that. It was puzzling. We couldn’t help but wonder, what in the world did they do to this girl?
Any number of answers is possible, including the possibility that she was just regressing back to baby behavior in a very foreign situation. A 19 month old acting like a 5 month old. A few days later we met some adoptive parents who know more about the orphanages than we do. They said if she was a ‘favorite’, the staff might just feed her and not expect her to feed herself.
Shamian Island on Guangzhou: Gorgeous
On Friday, the day we left Nanchang to go to Guangzhou, she started babbling.
The boys would talk to her and she’d talk back in baby babble. FUN! Now she’s letting me hold her; she’s letting Laura leave sometimes without protest; she’s playing with her brothers.
She sat very nicely on the plane to Guangzhou. The guy sitting next to Laura wanted to touch her (everyone likes to touch babies) but Zoe turned away from him. This is GOOD because it means she’s bonding to mama and not just letting strangers in her space. That’s GREAT news in the attachment department.
She’s not into cookies and stuff, but she sure likes spicy food. On Friday I bought some congee (rice porridge) from a street vendor, with some meat, extra peanuts, vegetables and red peppers, and Zoe slurped it up.
(Chinese food has some pretty strange things in it…. I think there’s probably a course in Chinese cooking school called “Advanced Culinary Applications of Fungus.”)
Guangzhou is the Silicon Valley of China, it’s the hi-tech manufacturing capital. It’s slick and modern, and while not as big as Shanghai, I’m guessing peoples’ personal income here is higher. It looks more like the US or Tokyo or Singapore than China.
Our guide told us at one point Guangzhou was adding 500 new cars to the road every single day. “Guangzhou, where cars are cheap and parking is expensive.”
Chinese girl with cleft lip. Photo taken by GlobalGiving.co.uk
We have to spend a few days in Guangzhou because the US Embassy is here and the US government has to accept her as a citizen. Guangzhou is the adoption capital of China. The hotel here is crawling with adopting families; many are “serial adopters.”
Quite a few of the kids here have very significant special needs – club feet, club hands, cleft lip and palate, limb differences, heart issues.
The other day one of my friends sent me a review of a book called “Jesus Potter Harry Christ.” According to the review, Harry Potter is “a repacking of the Jesus Christ story, but one that eclipses that story completely.”
How many people do YOU know who are flying around the globe and taking in kids nobody else wants because they were inspired by… Harry Potter?
I have a ton of friends who are serial entrepreneurs; now I’ve got a bunch more who are serial adopters. Folks who reach into that box of chocolates repeatedly, at considerable expense, and provide whatever is necessary – medical care, mothering, fathering, brothers, sisters, communities.
We went to the Guangzhou medical examination office. The place was a ZOO. Tons of adoptive families with kids in tow, and a few Chinese people getting ready to move abroad. Zoe got checked out and signed off.
Then today at breakfast I met…. one of my customers!
A certain Kurt Hjelle from Oswego Illinois, with his wife Lynn. Kurt walked up to me and said, “Are you Perry Marshall?”
“Yes I am!”
He says, “I came to your 2006 AdWords seminar, the one where you gave away the MacBooks. I was there when that heckler started yelling at you. We’re here adopting our new little girl!”
Wow, how cool is that?
We invited them to sit down and have breakfast with us. They told this story of getting on a steam locomotive – like a train that seemed 100 years old, where they shovel coal into the tender with a giant spade. They traveled 6 hours to some strange city so they could get one single form stamped by the police department.
Crazy.
So here we all are, members of the same incoming class of Freshmen adopters.
Yesterday Number One Son strapped Zoe in her stroller and sprinted down the sidewalk. Wheee! She LOVED it – the huge grin on her face was priceless.
Zoe’s babbling; she’s letting daddy hold her, sometimes she lets her older brothers carry her around; she’s pointing at everything and making noises. Right now as I write, she’s taking a nap.
This girl’s gonna grow up FAST. I plan on enjoying every minute of it.
Perry Marshall
P.S.: At dinner today she was singing to her french fries.
More pics at http://compassionmama.blogspot.com/2011/12/guangzhou-day-15.html
China Pollution: Normal Day vs. Good Day
The picture below is a normal day in Nanchang China – view from my hotel room:
Nanchang China on a typical day
Last night, a cold front blew in, so it’s very windy and clear today:
Nanchang China on a clear day
Every day we’ve been here, it’s been like the first picture. Today, everyone outside is upbeat and clearly enjoying the weather, even though for southern China it’s c-o-l-d!
Here’s a map that shows you where we are. Nanchang population is 5 million – about the same as Houston. There are about 35 cities in China that are bigger than that, which just blows my mind. The province of Jiangxi is the same size as Florida but it has 41 million people – as many people as California!
By the way, the entire east coast of China is polluted like this. City or farmland, it doesn’t matter, the smog is relentless. Yesterday I drove 100 miles east to Xinyu, and even on the highway in wide open country, the haze didn’t change a bit. It was overcast and you couldn’t see the clouds.
The Chinese are acutely aware of this problem; it’s part and parcel of being a developing country. The national newspaper has weekly smog reports by city. I lay odds that in 10 years China will have cleaned this up considerably. Meanwhile, if you live in a clean place be thankful, because the world is only as beautiful as the air you breathe.
Perry
Orphan Story, Adoption Story
MamaLaura snuggles our new daughter
The queen says, “Oh, how I wish that I had a daughter that had skin white as snow, lips red as blood, and hair black as ebony”.
Soon after that, the queen gives birth to a baby girl who has skin white as snow, lips red as blood, and hair black as ebony. They name her Snow White. As soon as the child is born, her mother the queen dies.
Orphan story.
A widowed prince has a daughter, Cinderella. She’s the subject of envy and anger towards his new wife. The girl is ensnared by her governess in killing her stepmother and convincing her father to marry her.
The governess succeeds, and then brings forward six daughters of her own, who abuse Cinderella, sending her into the kitchen to work as a servant.
Orphan story.
Bambi loses his mother to a hunter’s bullet and mourns her loss.
Orphan story.
My buddy Joshua Russell is a film producer and teaches screenwriting at DePaul University. Josh sez:
“If you want to make your audience feel empathy for a character, inflict him with a wound. Take away a parent so he becomes an orphan – or at least half orphan.
Mama gives Zoe her first Marshall family breakfast
The view outside our hotel window. Someone's raising chickens on top of the building on the right. The haze isn't weather, it's smog.
Have you noticed? Nearly every Disney story is an orphan story. It’s Disney’s #1 formula.
Disney’s not the only one. There’s Pixar: Andy’s favorite toy is Woody, and in Toy Story Three, Andy goes off to college and leaves his toys in a box. The toys fear Andy has outgrown them. They escape and decide to climb in a donation box for the Sunnyside Daycare.
At the climax of the movie, Woody and the other toys are then pushed onto another conveyor belt leading to an incinerator. Lotso coldly taunts them: “You guys are daycare center rejects and nobody wants you anymore!” It’s the long dark night of the discarded toy’s soul.
Orphan story.
Luke Skywalker gets his hand cut off by Darth Vader. Then Vader reveals his true identity: “LUKE, I AM YOUR FATHER. Join me and the Dark side of the Force, where we can rule together!”
Star Wars is an Orphan story too.
In the story of Joseph, his brothers sell him into slavery, soak his coat of many colors in blood and tell his father he’s been ravaged by a wild animal. Traders carry him off to Egypt where he spends years in prison.
Orphan story.
Harry Potter’s parents die shortly after he’s born and he’s raised by Muggles. Only years later does he begin to uncover his true identity.
Orphan story.
In the story of the Garden of Eden, the man and woman shatter their connection with God, discovering their nakedness and getting cast out of the garden.
Orphan story.
The best part about China is the signs. Like this one on our window sill: "No Tossing."
In my Niche Celebrity course there’s a section called “The psychotic weirdness of marketing, dysfunctions, and cult behavior.” It’s about identifying people’s woundedness – because the best kind of customer is a guy who’s got a chip on his shoulder, a deep insecurity, a desperate need to prove his worth. An orphan. (An orphan with money, preferably.)
In last year’s Karate Kid movie, the hero, Dre, has lost his father several years ago. He moves to Beijing where bullies pick on him. He has the good fortune of meeting Kung Fu master Jackie Chan and eventually wins the championship, earning back his respect.
In orphan stories, the orphan always has to bust his ass. He’s gotta earn his stripes and prove his worth.
Everyone can relate to this. Everyone has, in some way, shape or form, been dropped off and abandoned on the steps of some government building. We’ve all had to fend for ourselves.
Nothing’s quite so irresistible or relate-able as an orphan story. The problem with it is, you never stop having to bust your ass. You’re never sure you’re good enough. Deep down you always secretly wish you could escape.
Sign above the men's urinal at the Kunming airport: "Warm Tips: Please Aim Carefully." The urinal sign at the Lijiang airport said, "Please stand a little closer. It's one small step for man and one giant leap for better civilization."
Why?
Because eventually, everyone gets sick and tired of being an orphan.
What’s the antidote to an orphan story?
Teacher Anne Sullivan breaks through Helen Keller’s isolation of blindness and deafness, and transforms her student into a well-read, well-traveled, prolific author and influential woman.
Adoption story.
Not a literal adoption, mind you, but nevertheless a commitment of love and faith with reckless abandon.
Fearing for his life, Baby Moses’s sister lays him in a basket and floats him down the Nile river. The Pharaoh’s daughter discovers him, takes pity on him and raises him with the privileges of nobility. He goes on to liberate his people from slavery and become a great patriarch, celebrated 3500 years later.
Adoption story.
An unmarried couple gives birth to a son they’re not ready for. Another couple, Paul and Clara, adopt him at birth. The boy’s name is Steve Jobs.
In the Kunming airport: Two biographies on Steve Jobs in Chinese, including the "official" one by Walter Isaacson
Adoption story.
God becomes man. He sacrifices Himself for the redemption of mankind and achieves victory over death.
Adoption story.
Every day, you decide which story you choose to live in. Orphan story? Or Adoption story?
Laura knows a family who’s adopted a whole bunch of handicapped kids. Their motto is “The more chromosomes the merrier.”
Joe & Susanna Musser traveled to a Soviet Bloc country a short time ago and adopted a girl named Katerina. She is 9 years old, but because of gross neglect and malnutrition, she looks 1.
They have to introduce food to her slowly and carefully to avoid throwing her system into shock; too much food would literally kill her.
But they’re taking it a step at a time and in a matter of weeks they’ve achieved a minor miracle. See the pics for yourself: http://theblessingofverity.com/2011/11/free-safe-loved/
Who says love doesn’t conquer all?
In May 2010, a one-month-old girl was dropped off on the steps of a government building in the Jianxi province of China. She had 2 1/2 toes on one foot, one leg a few inches shorter than the other. We’d been chipping away at the adoption process for a couple of years, and earlier this year when we saw her photo, we said, “That’s the one for us.”
The local newspaper regularly lists abandoned babies. This one listed Zoe, who was 1 month old when she was left in front of a government building. Left, third from bottom.
Yesterday the director of the orphanage came to our hotel and gave her to us. We spent the rest of the day getting to know our little girl.
Laura and I prefer the adoption version of the world to the orphan version of the world. The version where you don’t have to earn anything or win any rat race to be valued and loved. God’s economy instead of man’s. We’ve chosen to live in an adoption story.
You know what a faith community is? It’s a collection people who’ve said to God, “I’m tired of being an orphan. I want to be a son. I want to be a daughter.” We’re all just orphans who’ve decided to live in covenant together as adopted brothers and sisters.
Zoe’s handling this with aplomb. The orphanage director says she’s outgoing and friendly and very smart. She quietly observes us, and she’s hung out with each one of us and the kids.
Last night we laid her down in her crib and she slept through the night without a hitch.
Boy, I was not expecting that.
I think she’s still in protection mode; today when we took her to a government office to sign papers, she went inside her ‘shell’. But we came back and gave her toys and her 7 year old brother started playing with her, she perked up and started babbling.
Laura’s posted a photos of yesterday, meeting our little girl at
http://compassionmama.blogspot.com/2011/12/zoe-has-arrived.html
http://compassionmama.blogspot.com/2011/12/nanchang-day-10.html
I have the most wonderful, adventurous life. I can’t express how thankful I am. Thanks for listening to my story.
Perry Marshall
